We own more running shoes than normal shoes, have opinions on gels versus chews, and get excited about new sock technology. Our phones are full of route maps, split times, and post-run, sweaty selfies.
And yet, for all the seriousness we bring to training, the things we say (and hear) can be pretty funny, especially when non-runners get involved.
To non-runners, the things we say can sound ridiculous, and honestly, some of the things they say to us are even better.
Here are a few favourites from both sides.
Funny Things Marathoners Say
- “I’m training for a marathon.”
(And everyone in a 10-mile radius knows it.) - “I just ran a marathon.”
(Casually mentioned in every conversation for the next six months.) - “I can’t, I have a long run in the morning.”
(Goodbye Friday nights, hello foam roller.) - “It’s only 20 miles today.”
(The word ‘only’ hits different when you’re a runner.) - “I could have just gone to therapy.”
(Usually muttered around mile 22, somewhere between self-discovery and despair.) - “You didn’t tell me there were stairs.”
(A universal post-run complaint.) - “We’ll go out on Saturday night… in four months.”
(After taper. After recovery. After sleep.) - “My watch didn’t start, so the run doesn’t count.”
(Runner logic: if it’s not on Strava, it didn’t happen.) - “I paid money to wake up at 4 a.m. and run 26 miles for fun.”
(And somehow, it was worth every penny.) - “I think I lost a toenail, but at least I hit my negative splits.”
(Pain is temporary, but that perfect pacing lives forever.) - “I just need one more pair of running shoes.”
(Said every marathoner while standing in front of an overflowing shoe rack.) - “But these running shoes were on sale.”
(Said with complete sincerity — and zero guilt.) - “Let’s do a city break in Valencia in early December?”
(Totally innocent suggestion. Definitely not because there’s a marathon that weekend.) - “I was just doing a recovery run”
( I can definitely run much faster than that) - “I am training for a marathon”
(Not sure if I told you already.)
Things Non-Runners Say to Marathoners
- “How long is a marathon?”
(Still 26.2 miles, 42k. Every time.) - “How long is your marathon?”
(We wish it worked like that.) - “Are you running a 10k marathon?”
(Points for enthusiasm.) - “Did you win?”
(No, but I did beat my old self and that’s the point.) - “Why did you get a medal if you didn’t win?”
(Because 26.2 miles earns you something shiny.) - “You should have just gone to therapy.”
(We did. It was called the long run.) - “I thought you said never again”
(Remember, you were pretty adamant about that at the finish line) - “I wouldn’t even drive that far.”
(That’s fair. We probably shouldn’t either.) - “Why haven’t you run Boston?”
(It’s… complicated. Qualifying times, lotteries, knees, long story.) - “Can we go shopping after your long run?”
(Only if it’s somewhere with snacks, soft seats and no stairs.) - “So… do you win money for that?”
(Just eternal glory and a free banana.) - “You’re going to ruin your knees.”
(Not if the foam roller gets me first.) - “26 miles? I don’t even like driving that far.”
(We’ve heard. Repeatedly.)
Whether you’re the one running 26.2 miles for fun or the one wondering why on earth anyone would, it’s all part of the joy of being a runner.
We laugh, we cry, we sign up for another race. Yes, it takes a bit of craziness to run marathons, or even just to lace up and head out the door, but that’s exactly what makes it so rewarding. Life’s too short to play it boring.
What’s the funniest thing you’ve heard, or said, about marathon running? Drop it in the comments, we’d love to hear it.😂🏃♂️🏃♀️
And, if you want to hang out with other runners who think “fun” and “26.2 miles” belong in the same sentence, come join Achieve Running Club. We take running seriously… just not ourselves.
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